A ausência do olhar
Eu gosto muito de me comunicar por meio de mensagens escritas, seja usando e-mail, comunicadores instantâneos ou mesmo redes sociais. Acho prático. Por um lado, você pode mandar a mensagem quando quiser, ainda que a boa educação mande evitar algumas formas de contato em horários de descanso. Por outro lado, a pessoa tem a liberdade de te responder quando puder.
Mas, confesso que estou repensando sobre as virtudes dessa comunicação por texto. Desde que quebrei minha resistência e aceitei participar de alguns grupos do WhatsApp, tenho concluído que a ausência do olhar do interlocutor altera significativamente o comportamento de quem manda a mensagem. Eu já vinha refletindo sobre isso há muito tempo, desde que ouvi pela primeira vez a expressão "macho de computador", utilizada para definir aquelas pessoas que, quando se sentam diante de um computador (ou de um celular, tablet etc.), ficam corajosas e disparam mensagens em tons que nunca existiriam em uma conversa direta e pessoal com o destinatário delas. E como eu conheço gente assim! Pessoas doces, aparentemente calmas, com quem você nunca imaginaria ter uma discussão sequer. De repente, você se depara com agressões, acusações e outros textos cheios de ódio dessa mesma pessoa, como se fossem dois seres totalmente diferentes habitando um só corpo.
Com o tempo, fui percebendo que o tom não muda apenas em relação a agressões, mas também em relação a declarações de amor e afeto. Em grupos virtuais, vejo palavras tão doces que me custa a acreditar que saíram da boca (ops, dos teclados!) daquele ser humano. Gente que sempre tive como seca ou, no mínimo, totalmente contida em relação a expressar sentimentos bons, de repente passa a dizer "eu te amo", "você é tudo na minha vida" e por aí vai. O que será que transforma um coração de pedra em um poço de doçura de um instante para o outro? A distância? A ausência de confronto com o olhar alheio? E quem exatamente somos nós: aquele que é agressivo ou amoroso ao extremo nas mensagens, ou aquele que mantém um comportamento mais retilíneo quando o mundo virtual não funciona como intermediário das relações?
Sempre amei o texto, até por dever às palavras escritas grande parte do que sou. Mas, ando refletindo sobre o uso exagerado que temos feito delas. O olhar à frente, o face a face, a possibilidade de um abraço ou de um tapa diante da palavra dita, tudo isso anda me parecendo muito mais humano do que qualquer emoção exacerbada no mundo virtual, para o mal ou para o bem. Ainda que eu deva muito à escrita, sinto que expressar opiniões e sentimentos diante de um olhar me faz sentir mais vivo. E me sentir mais vivo é tudo o que eu quero nestes tempos difíceis.
Alexandre Henry
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